The Elite Blog

Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my Blog? It took me minutes to write, will you take a look?

26 May 2010

By Paul White

Despite the Chapter's default setting being seventeen referrals, this week's result of sixteen can be explained by Stephanie Lunn not being able to attend. I have said it before and I will say it again, that we are "Lunn's Luvvies". Darryl Buchanan stepped into Stephanie's (red) shoes as Chapter Director this morning, but it will be a while before he sells us the whole "Buchanan's Buddies" thing.

Darryl is the Leader of the "Finish 0830 Sharp" party, of which Mel Kenny of Radcliffe & Newlands Independent Financial Planners is our local MP.

I personally have never seen the need to visit Darryl's birthplace of New Zealand. What's the point? They're all over here! The band "Crowded House", incidentally, takes it name from the experience of every Kiwi renting in London.

I quizzed Daniel J Fealy of OP Drywalling this morning about why they were not called PO Drywalling. Apparently, OP is taken from the letters comprising "Olympic".

My Visitor, Leyah Knight, jingle-writer extraordinaire, very kindly consented to join our Visitors' Day and encountered delays on the Central Line, as did Marion Broomes of Keys2Finance Mortgage Brokers and Alan Patient, Chartered Accountant. Leyah has beautiful skin and is always challenged in Supermarkets, when she tries to buy alcohol.

BTW, did you see those pictures of Grace Jones in the papers this week? She looked great for 62 years of age. I hope that I look like her when I am 62, as well!

You will have heard of my SOA campaign. No? It stands for "Stamp Out Acronyms". Sue Terpilowski of Imageline Marketing mentioned her success in introducing last week's visitor to the FSB, as requested. I know that one only has 60 seconds to pitch, but saying the "Federation of Small Businesses" only takes a short while.

My efforts in the 60 second Silver Tongue award were rewarded with a Mention In Dispatches and a Bronze Medal. Gold went to Richard T O'Brien, whose request to establish those with a share in a freehold produced Linky Trott of Edwin Coe Solicitors, with whom Richard has already done business, to everyone's amusement. As he will be setting next week's theme, you can bet your bottom denarius, that it will be based on ancient Rome, so get swatting now!

Mads Nybo Jørgensen of Mac Million Ltd had an easy ride for his ten minute presentation, in that he only has to show a couple of videos, answer a few "puerile" questions for Richard and Bøb is your ønkel. The fact that he spends an hour setting up and packing up the equipment is neither here nor there.

We were treated to a 3D video, which he had made for Coca-Cola on the occasion of the World Cup in South Africa. It was anaglyptic, which we all know means "a moving or still picture consisting of two slightly different perspectives of the same subject in contrasting colours, that are superimposed on each other, producing a three-dimensional effect when viewed through two correspondingly coloured filters." Well we do now! Then Mads had the cheek to ask for the 3D spectacles back!

Darryl was most insistent that nobody thank Mads for his talk and I am happy to oblige.

There is a gap in the market, No-one is currently providing Automated Obscene Telephone Calls. My concept involves the recipient checking with the household's bill-payer first, before selecting button one for complete silence, two for mild breathing and three for really heavy breathing. At only 35 pence per minute (incl. VAT), although calls to mobiles may be much higher, this service represents excellent value for money and I look forward to pitching it on "Dragon's Den".

I have a terrible confession to make. I completely forgot that our Star Reader, Holly Aird, had a birthday two Sundays, or was it two Tuesdays ago? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holly_Aird

Happy 41st, Holls! What sort of a stalker am I? I do hope that this means that I will not be demoted from being your Number One Fan!

Vivat, Crescat, Floreat!

 

 

Permalink: http://www.bni-elite.co.uk/BNIVIsitorsDay26thMay2010 (copy'n'paste)

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